Podgy fanboy Frank Vogel lives a dead-end life. He’s addicted to pop culture, Internet porn, and fantasies about Rebecca Hansen, a Buffy-like cheerleader from his high school days, but he yearns for something more. When he finds out Mrs. Carlson, his sweet, elderly landlady, is a vampire, a whole new world opens up to him. Blinded by dreams of sexy, mysterious vampires, Frank begs Mrs. Carlson to turn him. Against her better judgment, she does.
Unfortunately, Frank's life doesn't seem much different afterward. Then he runs into his unwitting nemesis, Will Chase--former high-school football team captain, former boyfriend to Rebecca--and makes gleeful plans to destroy him... until he discovers that he and Will have a lot in common.